moments of revelation
On a cool fall evening, after hearing the dictate of a catholic nun,
a desolate young girl looked into the eyes of her newborn son.
She had given a life, a spirit and a soul to her sweet child,
But had been told rather strongly, she was too young and too wild.
She gave her child a kiss, said goodbye, and then walked away,
The child has never stopped loving her … I will love her for ever and a day.
It was at the age of two while in the middle of a dream when I heard the sound of the wind calling to me.
I went out through the back door of the house where I was kept and followed the call of the name I was born with.
The light of the moon opened a trail through the darkness till I was led to the shore of the river called the Black Creek.
It was while I was there that I saw a vision of a woman in white looking towards me as she walked backwards into the forest.
I followed her, but I became lost and confused as she disappeared like a ghost within the black of the night.
Believing it would be best to find my way back to the home that was not mine, I chose instead to go deeper into the blind of the woods.
For as long as I remember, I’ve lived a life shadowed with careless attention but not a mother or a father or a brother or a sister to call my own.
I did have a guardian and I recall her saying to me, “turn the corner and turn it well, cause you never know when it will turn on what you know”.
It was at the age of nine, when I dreamt I was back inside my mummy's tummy, sucking on the love of her blood.
"Is this where I am meant to be" thought I to myself or is it just an illusion meant to shadow me as I become lost in the flood.
“You never know what might await you as you travel through life, but whatever you find, it won’t be me” ...
... said the father to the son he didn’t want, didn't care to know, and refused to believe had come from his seed.
It was at the age of eleven when I fell out of grace with the man giving out tickets to heaven.
It was then that I feared that I would never again see the woman in white. Could it be she who would call out to me?
But how would she find where I am? Here, where I am lost and alone, and trapped in the deep of the void on my own.
It was then when I met the daughter of a neighbour who invited me deep into her room, and proceeded to teach me how I came to be.
It was at the age of sixteen when I heard the mirror say to myself, “Look outside and you will see the moon begin to fall”.
“What is it that I cannot see?” I asked as I looked deep into the eyes of my reflection in the mirror on the wall.
It was then that I feared that I would forever be wandering aimlessly alone in the deep of the night,.
searching, hoping, cyring for the wind of my dreams to deliver me into the soul of the woman in white.
At the age of twenty-one, there was still so much left to be done, and so little time to do it all before it became too late to do any of it.
So I got in with a crowd of adventurous people, including Miss Chris of Bliss, who brought me the magic of the silver spoon.
Miss Chris dared to sweep me away from all of my madness, but she could not rob me of all of my sadness.
One night the sound of a fire yelled all around me. Could it have been the vodka and gin, or just a bad dose of Mexican mescaline.
It was at the age of twenty-five when I stopped believing in Santa Claus, the tooth fairy or that any dream of mine would ever come true.
So I dared myself to leave the darkness of the void, and to make my way back towards the daybreak.
It was then that I saw the rising of the sun in the west ... and I walked towards it ... till eventually I found myself at the edge of a canyon.
I looked down and across, and above and beyond. If only I could save me from myself. It was then that I called for the woman in white.
I continued walking until I came across a reflecting pool of water ... “YOU are who YOU are meant to BE”, said the reflection back to me.
It was then I began to think of things that I never took the time to think of before. I was then I began to think of what brought me to here.
I was tired after all this thinking, and after drinking a mouthful of water, I fell asleep by a log beneath the twinkling stars.
It was when I awoke that I knew that my life was mine to live and my right. It was then that I knew my life was a gift from the woman in white.
©Michael Ricco 1978
Desolation lurks in the shadows as the past is passing behind.
Events of the day and of the night have darkened the colours of my mind.
Silent thoughts lie unprotected and vulnerable to a wintry breeze.
Dreams of the present and of the future are trapped within a deep freeze.
Old sins remain unatoned and the memories of the past are battered.
The chances that I failed to chance lie strewn about torn and shattered.
Blue turns to grey and my eyes no longer see into tomorrow or beyond today.
The cold of this world has frozen a life that should be busy with play.
Where wind once blew warmly it now blows hard and cold despair.
The branches of the trees are as bare as the life which with only I share.
Existence is a play within a world of muted emotions and silent treason.
Rhymes have no reason and the colours of my mind change with the season.
©Michael Ricco 1982
I was sitting outside one warm summer night,
alone with the stillness, with the moon shining bright.
Out of the darkness, a shadow came down from a tree,
and out of the silence, I heard a voice in the wind calling to me.
My eyes looked to the sky, then down to the ground.
the voice in the wind called on me to follow its sound.
I stood up and seeing the darkness get swept by the moonlight,
I decided to follow the sound of the voice deep into the night.
As the light of the moon began to fade from the sky,
I called to the voice to explain where it was taking me and why
but though the voice did not answer, I continued to follow it along
I hoped that what I was doing and where I was going would do me no wrong.
There are places I’ve never been but where I’d like to go,
there are people I’ve never met but who I would like to know
I want to leave my life behind as well as the solitary games I play
I want this voice in the wind to lead me to a colourful place far, far away.
Alone with the wind calling out the sound of my name
I began to wonder if it was just my mind playing a game.
I do hope that the wind to whom I’ve surrendered my hand
leads me to a life filled with brighter colours and soft golden sand.
By the start of the morning, I found myself by the shore of the sea
Never before have I felt so scared, and yet never have I felt this free
I looked far across the water, and I then closed my eyes
and listened to the birds flutter their wings as the sun began to rise.
Just as sudden as it began, the wind had grown silent
I listened, and I looked but could not find where the voice went.
I looked to the sea, and then I looked all around
I looked to the sky, and then my eyes fell to the ground.
Darkness fell around me, and again I began to feel lonely,
I started to cry, but suddenly tired, I fell asleep by the sea
I had many dreams, not all of them good until I became awakened by a scream
I found that I was back in my room, and it was then that I knew this had just been a dream.
©Michael Ricco 1978
ALL CONTENT COPYRIGHT MICHAEL RICCO